So,

Attended the press screening for The Darjeeling in the beautiful Santana Row in San Jose. Was looking forward to it.

However, what unfolded was not too pleasing to my sensibility. The opening was actually interesting wherin a short film is played first and then the feature commences, but wait, the two are linked and as are the characters.

This film was regressive and old world in more ways than one. When I go to see these "Hollywood films" made in India, I expect to see Rajasthan...and I got Rajasthan, I expect to see Indian men and women...wearing turbans and sarees....and I got that....I expect to see cows and villages....and I got that, I expect to see some of India's finest actors like Irfan Khan being reduced to two bit dummies.....and I got that (I thought TV actor Gaurav Chopra in Blood Diamond had a more impactful role).....I expect to see and India.......neither me, nor my parents have ever seen (cause it is of Baba Azam Ka Zamaana....and that was 1910) and I got that........

and all of this would have been very , unbearably bearable, except that it was the typical 'eastern mysticism" film, of finding oneself.....it definitely lost me.

It's a train journey in , perhaps, Burma of 1901, but has been attempted to pass of as India. The male actors have done a fine job, but I wouldn't call it extraordinary. Owen Wilson probably had the author backed role and shows shades of the "more than just a comic." Shwartzman and Brody are ok and passable, possibily Brody actually is solid, and appears to get into the character perfectly, but the facial expression remains unchanged.

So I am supposed to like this film, because it has links to the Copolla's (whose restaurant I have had coffee in, in Palo Alto) and because in IMDB it is written that Martin S, is a big fan of his movies...probably......but I ain't Martin S, I am just a bored viewer and also because he is supposed to be brilliant....great....but this is not an IQ test, this is a movie, and it appears (being diplomatic), actually IT DOES NOT (being blunt), do anything to me. And what of the women in this movie.

My next statement is going to make womankind hate me, but see the film for yourself if you think I am wrong. The women come, there is a sex scene, the women move on...or they become the beloved nun and mother....talk about extremism....why after watching this film, I think Sanjay Gupta's Musafir and Kaante, show woman in a better light, at least they are glamorous and can dance well.

Oh wait but I am the reveiwer and I am supposed to say good things, at least some, cause I got a press invite...ok here goes, the theater was brilliant, Santana Row is amazing and the men's loo was very clean!!!

Why, oh why did they not release this in Naz8, at least I could have got an "out" or a "release" by venturing off to see JG or even a Pooja Bhat's Dhoka..

Wait this is not what "intelligent" and "knowledgable about cinema" and "lovers of the cinematic movement" say....but then I never said I am any of those, Shekhar Kapur...who's he...aha the man who made Mr India....did he also make the short film Elizabeth Part 2....no that was not a short film, that was me being short on recall memory..

No such issues with Darjeling, I recall, every boring minute and frame really well, what I can't recall is how many pieces of popcorn my neighbor put in his mouth....maybe I should do a Phd on "Popcorn in the mouth and it's effect on the human psyche" maybe that Phd in that topic done at the right Ivy League, will make me like the Darjelling.

My current state of "regular reviewer and audience, definitely does not

Sincerely,

Vivek "ok give me Gullu, Shakti, Bips...why even give me a Kashmira...ok I will settle for Gufi Paintal....just don't give me Darjelling please" Kumar